Portchy's Day at the PO Man's Derby

 

The e-programme is downloadable as a pdf file

Hopperational Details
Date & Venue	Monday 25th August 2025 at The OnSite Group Stadium, Wicor Recreation Ground
Result	AFC Portchester 4 Moneyfields 0
Competition	Isthmian League Division One South-Central (Step 4)
Hopstats	#804 on the lifetime list. Here because I am in the area for the Bank Holiday weekend.
Context
A local PO-postcode derby for the Bank Holiday Monday. AFC Portchester are up in Step 4 after promotion as champions from the Wessex League last season. They have three points from three league matches (one win). Moneyfields have a win and a draw, so four points. Two days ago Portchy lost at Bedfont Sports and Moneyfields shared the points in a 4-4 draw with Hayes & Yeading United.
Match Report
Before I forget, be warned that the car parking amount charged by the PayByPhone app was significantly more than the amount implied on the notice boards. If you go hopping here (well worth it) take plenty of change, and go early if you want to park near the ground. It's an interesting arena and the club made a lot of effort to look after a Bank Holiday crowd. You can imagine how the facilities have grown step-by-step as the club moved up through the pyramid. This was a game of two halves. The home team scored all four goals before the interval and the points were in the proverbial bag. The opening goal after five minutes was a gift from the visiting defence after the ball was lost in an attempt to play out from the back in the modern way.  Alfie Stanley rolled the ball into the unguarded net. The second came from number 11 after 11 minutes. Zak Willett found himself in lots of space, he cut back inside the approaching defender, and the pic below shows him shaping to place the ball in the far corner. The third was pinged in from 45 metres or so (you get proper physics units in this blog) by Stanley who picked up the ball in midfield and had spotted the keeper off his line. The fourth was arguably the best of the lot, thrashed from the left into the far corner by Ryan Wilkins. So, 4-0 at half-time. I moved to the stand on the opposite side in search of shade for the second half, with temperatures around 303K (that's the Kelvin scale of absolute temperature right there) which is more commonly known in this country as 30 degrees C. Maybe because of the temperature, maybe because the demolition job was already done, but the second half was anticlimactic. Moneyfields never gave up and were allowed plenty of possession, but they had only really created one decent chance before the 75-minute mark. Portchester didn't look too concerned once they had weathered the first ten minutes or so of the second half. For me at the final whistle, it was a race back to the Yappmobile for what turned out to be a tortuous return journey around the dreaded M25 western section. Good day though, decent entertainment for the passing neutral and plenty of other culture, history, scenery and interest in the general area. Recommended if not already ticked!
So What?
The clubs end the day in 6th and 18th place.
Pre-match Entertainment
A circuit of Portchester Castle, watching oystercatchers feeding on the mud flats, a stroll along part of the English coastal path (and, I suspect, disturbing a couple in flagrante behind a tree), looking across towards Portsmouth, and stopping for an ice-cream at the nearby Salt Café. Insert your own joke about Portchester's defence looking solid.
Pix
Goalkeeper Top Colour Stats Update
The background to this, and the latest keeper top colour league table, is here on this dedicated page. Today Grey beats Blue, as predicted, and the clean sheet is enough to take Grey to the top of the Tops table. Pre-match Prediction based on Keeper Top Colour: Prediction: Home win Was the prediction correct? Yes % of correct predictions so far 48% (91 from 189)
What Next?
No idea, to be honest but most likely an FA Cup game at the weekend. Watch @ModusHRandom on Twitter/X.

Moneyfields Three-Two Tight to Mention

Hopperational Details
Date & Venue	Saturday 31 October 2020 at Moneyfields Sports Ground
Result	Moneyfields 3 Kidlington 2
Competition	FA Trophy 3rd Qualifying Round
Hopstats	Ground 718 on the lifetime list, and I am here pragmatically because very few of my seasonal target grounds are in the lowest tier of Covid-19 designations.
Context
Both teams entered the competition in the last round, and both arrive at this fixture via 2-1 home wins. Moneyfields beat Basingstoke Town and Kidlington defeated Didcot Town. These sides are both in Step 4 Southern League divisions, but geographically separated with the hosts in Division One South and the visitors from Division One Central.
In One Sentence
Moneyfields came from behind to win with two very late goals after a red card for a key Kidlington defender.
So What?
Time for the usual sentence to go here, the one about Moneyfields in the hat for the next round and Kidlington concentrating on the league.
Pre-match Entertainment
After a horrendous drive down south in monsoon conditions, a pint down the road at The Jolly Taxpayer, putting the world to rights with a couple of strangers I met off the internet. You know who you are, and it was great to catch up with you!
Match Report
Thankfully the weather conditions improved as forecast and this turned out to be a compelling, competitive game with a dramatic twist at the end. It started out oddly enough with one of the assistant referees slipping on the muddy touchline and getting a match-ending injury. It didn’t look good. The call went over the PA for a replacement, and one was found fairly quickly. I think my FA Class 3 badge has lapsed now so I didn’t even think about it. I’m also sixty-two, with the mobility of a supertanker and a sensitivity to abuse concerning my sexuality and parentage, so not a good match for modern lino duty. Both teams had tried to stay warm during the ten-minute delay but Moneyfields were caught cold from the restart. Callum Harvey hooked in acrobatically at the far post to give Kidlington the lead. We saw a couple of great saves from the Kidlington keeper Christian Lawrence but on the second occasion Kieran Roberts was able to fire in an equaliser to send the sides in level at half-time. Good contest at this point, not much either way and defences on top though both sides looking to dictate. Half-time: Moneyfields 1 Kidlington 1 The end-to-end action continued as Lawrence saved well from a one-on-one (with a hint of offside) just before Kidlington took the lead through Jacob Davidge, with just over twenty minutes to go. Moneyfields had to respond quickly and so nearly equalised with a slick move down the right, but the attacking player sliding in at the far post could not make enough contact as the ball skidded across the box. Then came the turning point of the game. A red card was given to Kidlington’s Tom Franklin and it was a tad too long before he started the walk. The gentleman scribbling furiously on the clipboard nearby at this point may well have been a referee’s assessor. I can’t confirm whether it was straight red or second yellow, but it changed the game. The absence of Franklin’s aerial defensive qualities was arguably a factor in the denouement. Kidlington held firm until there were only two minutes left on the clock. Lawrence half-stopped a shot but Roberts was in the right spot to poke in the equaliser. With a penalty shootout now looking likely (as I had mischievously suggested at 3pm on Twitter from the keepertopcolourstats) there was to be one final plot twist. A stoppage time corner for Moneyfields was initially repelled but the second cross found its way to the far post where Steve Hutchings headed in. A really good game, and in good company, to end this phase of football-watching for the season. Great effort from both sides in tricky conditions and a club that is well worth a visit for any groundhoppers.
Pix
All taken from one vantage point this week. Moneyfields in yellow shirts, Kidlington in some kind of luminous green. The pitch invaders had no effect on the play. Keep your football-is-not-for-gulls jokes to yourself please ;) Black-headed gull in winter plumage in the holding midfield position (Reliable source: Martyn Y)
CV19 Comment
Lots of sensible procedures in place – track and trace details collected, one way systems in the bar, table service, helpful tweets before the game with download details for the relevant apps. Two conclusions to be made once again, as they have been at every match I’ve been to this year. The clubs have done everything asked of them but a significant number of people, especially the under-30s, are largely paying no attention. Secondly, for me personally this is a safer activity than going to work at school, but only because this district is in the lowest tier of CV prevalence. The same behaviour in a Tier 3 district would almost certainly have been a spreading event, and the reaction to scientists Whitty and Vallance on social media as I write (on Saturday evening) shows over and over again that the general public aren’t accepting what they are being shown through the numbers. Sadly, I won’t be around to see what historians make of all this. I doubt whether it will be complimentary.
Goalkeeper Top Colour Stats Update
Usually accompanied by a pre-match prediction on Twitter just before kickoff. Working towards being able to compute a respectable statistical significance test by the end of the season. The full keeper top performance table from my last 219 matches is here, on this separate page. Custodian with floodlight, rooftops and diesel multiple-unit (2020) This week Black beats Orange, but no clean sheets and no change in the league table positions. Again slightly surprised to see a top that clashes with the referee's kit. Pre-match Prediction based on Keeper Top Colour: Prediction: Away Win (on Penalties) Was the prediction correct? No % of correct predictions so far 49% (36 from 74) Based on conventional 3pts for a win, 1pt for a draw, but also -1pt for a goal conceded (GC) and +5pts for a clean sheet (CS).  Colours ranked on a points per game (PPG) basis. The odd decimal places were caused either by undeniable half-and-half tops or lower league sub keepers in a different colour.  The Fire Cracker colour was confirmed with the help of the social media team at Dulux UK.  All of this arises from a comment attributed to Petr Cech (and supported by anonymous scientists of some description) that orange is the best colour for a goalkeeper because it changes the behaviour of other players around the box. It is supposedly because of an innate primeval human reaction to the colour and the colour “spreads” more in the vision of a striker at the key moment of decision. Genius or garbage? The evidence is gathering here, and is leaning towards the latter.
What Next?
As you will understand, not much. The spreadsheet shows fourteen grounds on my “everywhere down to and including Step 4” priority list, but there is no sensible way to plan, and for some grounds such as Brentford I would be way down the ticket priority list when attendance is allowed again. Thank you for reading the blog this season. I will pick up the threads again as soon as Covid-19 arrangements allow. In the meantime, stamp collecting beckons.

No Consolation for Citizens with The Money Problems

Second e-programme of the season

Hopperational Details
Date & Venue	Wednesday 26 December 2018 at The Simplyhealth City Ground
Result	Winchester City 0 Moneyfields 3
Competition	Southern League Division One South (Step 4)
Hopstats	669 on the lifetime list.  Not random, but chosen for the noon kickoff time which meant that my hours of travelling were reasonable.
Context
Mid-table Winchester host Moneyfields who are in the lowest play-off position at the time of writing.  Moneyfields will be out for revenge after Winchester won the reverse fixture back in August.
In one sentence
Two well-taken first half goals from the visitors put the home side’s missed chances into perspective.
So what?
Moneyfields hold on to their play-off position and Winchester remain mid-table.
Match Report
The home side made the early running, though Moneyfields’ keeper Steve Mowthorpe only had one real save to make, a tip-over from a sharp shot from a narrow angle.  Moneyfields then missed their first real chance, an unchallenged header from a free-kick.  Back at the other end, Mowthorpe narrowed the angle enough to thwart Oli Bailey who was through one-on-one after a rebound.  That was to prove a big miss in the light of subsequent developments.  Winchester then needed a goalline clearance to stop Moneyfields again.  With 20 minutes gone, it looked as if there would be goals in the game. Bailey needed treatment after being hit in the face by the ball, but shot back on like a greyhound without permission to earn a yellow card.  There was a fair amount of moaning at the officials going on from both sides.  Moneyfields’ Steve Hutchings questioned a throw-in call from the assistant – it is just me or were all footballers away when they did parallax errors in physics at school?  I digress. Bailey recovered well enough to force Mowthorpe into a good save, and then City’s Joe Hayward was played in by a clever backheel only to shoot just wide. Moneyfields showed their hosts how to finish as they took the lead on 34 minutes.  Joe Briggs curled a great shot across the keeper into the far corner after a set piece had been initially headed clear.  We had several niggles and yellow cards by this point too.  Then, in the 45th minute, Hutchings met another free-kick cross on the half-volley, back across the keeper into the other corner.  They even tried to claim a third in stoppage time but a goal-line clearance from a corner limited the first-half damage.  Nevertheless, it felt like job done. The third goal came just after the hour.  Hutchings, ever the irritant up top, went to ground.  The ref ignored the calls for a foul but the clearance rebounded somewhat kindly for Lloyd Rowlatt and the ball rolled over the line into the corner. After that, Winchester had plenty of possession and won several corners and freekicks.  The Moneyfields defence absorbed all the pressure and were not above the occasional old-school agricultural clearance.  A three-goal away win and a clean sheet has to go down as impressive and they are hard to beat. Winchester, with a crowd of 182 (GY note: corrected from first posting) today despite £5 admission for all, are holding their own well enough in the division and team spirit looked in good order despite the scoreline.  Today just goes to prove that oldest of pundits’ adages that you have to take your chances against the higher-placed teams.
Pix
Winchester in red-and-black.  This week's match pix are brought to you by the letter J.  J is for Jumping.
Goalkeeper Top Colour Stats
New this season – a pre-match prediction based only on keeper top colours as a preliminary test of the data.  Proper statistical significance test to follow in due course.  The table is now based on my last 170 matches watched. Pre-match Prediction based on Keeper Top Colour: Prediction: Away Win Was the prediction correct? Yes % of correct predictions so far 64% (16 from 25) Based on conventional 3pts for a win, 1pt for a draw, but also -1pt for a goal conceded (GC) and +5pts for a clean sheet (CS).  Colours ranked on a points per game (PPG) basis. For new readers the odd .5 was caused by a shocking half-and-half shirt and the .1 was due to a substitute goalkeeper in a different colour.  The Fire Cracker colour was confirmed with the help of the social media team at Dulux UK.  All of this arises from a comment attributed to Petr Cech that orange is the best colour for a goalkeeper because it changes the behaviour of other players around the box P W D L GC CS Pts PPG Red 10.0 5.0 1.0 4.0 11.0 3.0 20.0 2.000 Blue 42.1 19.0 7.0 16.1 60.0 14.0 74.0 1.758 Grey 49.5 23.0 11.0 15.5 80.5 14.0 69.5 1.404 Green 87.0 44.0 11.0 32.0 147.0 22.0 106.0 1.218 Fire Cracker 3.0 1.0 0.0 2.0 6.0 1.0 2.0 0.667 Maroon 5.0 2.0 1.0 2.0 9.0 1.0 3.0 0.600 Purple 20.0 8.0 4.0 8.0 42.0 5.0 11.0 0.550 Orange 43.5 14.0 8.0 21.5 80.5 7.0 4.5 0.103 Radioactive Bile 21.0 9.0 0.0 12.0 45.0 3.0 -3.0 -0.143 Yellow 34.0 9.0 7.0 18.0 73.0 5.0 -14.0 -0.412 Pink 17.0 5.0 5.0 7.0 35.0 1.0 -10.0 -0.588 Black 6.0 2.0 3.0 1.0 15.0 0.0 -6.0 -1.000 White 1.9 0.0 0.0 1.9 4.0 0.0 -4.0 -2.105
What Next?
Follow @GrahamYapp on Twitter!  34 more Step 4 grounds to go – hopefully another one to be ticked off on Saturday.