Newbury Newbie

This is not the first time that Modus Hopper Random has ventured into the wider sporting world.  There have been occasional forays into rugby union, basketball, ice hockey and cricket plus volleyball, water polo and canoeing from the London 2012 Olympics.  It is the first time that I have been racing.

Not a programme but a Racecard. Fine.

Hopperational details
Date & Venue	Tuesday 25 August at Newbury Racecourse
Result	Final net profit of £38.50
Competition	Evening Meeting (6 of 7 races at the meeting)
Hopping	A first.  Never been to horseracing before.
Pre-meeting preparation
None whatsoever.  Matt (son and heir #1) rang at 2.00pm and suggested this trip, so I gleefully abandoned GCSE physics preparation.  Roadworks on the Oxford bypass meant that we missed the 4.40pm race and weren’t able to start taking the bookies to the cleaners until 5.10pm.  We also made telephone contact with Chris (son and heir #2) who works in this business.  Paternal loyalty means that I will not reveal the full extent of the utter uselessness of his tips on this particular occasion.  It's only Variance.
This event in one sentence
A new experience for me and an enjoyable way to spend an early evening with my son redistributing the nation’s wealth with greater effectiveness than Robin Hood.
So what?
It is now just a matter of time before I pitch up in the Royal Enclosure at Ascot.
The drama unfolds
The weather leading up to the meeting has been awful and going was expected to be soft.  Not surprisingly, there were many withdrawals from the original entries and we fully expected prediction to be difficult, a bit of a lottery really.  As we bought our tickets, we saw that the SPs of the first two in the first race were 12/1 and 50/1.  This could be messy.  As we arrived at the grandstand there came an announcement that the going had now, after the first race, been declared heavy. We stood in front of the on-course bookmakers and considered our options.  The bookies work in pairs – someone at the front handling the cash and someone at the side entering data into a bespoke keypad.  The odds for each horse change now and then and the best feeling is when you have backed a horse at a better price by getting in early.  It's you against them and their calculations. Matt reckoned that Bellajeu would be favourite for the 5.10 and so it proved.  He backed it for a win.  I went for an each way bet on Powderonthebonnet for no reason other than it was priced at 40/1 in a small field.  Time for a clip.  Look for jockeys wearing brown and blue respectively as the bookies keep our money.  Knight of Wands is the winner. We considered the field for the 5.40 over a steak pie. I went for Man Look for the simple reason that his jockey was called Murphy and I’d heard somewhere that the Irish are good at this.  Matt changed his mind at the last minute and backed Kallisha each way at 11/2.  This was inspired as George Baker brought Kallisha home seven lengths in front with Cottesloe second and Man Look somewhere behind.  No matter, Matt was now significantly up for the evening already. The 6.10 also proved a success, and Sahreej, ridden by Dane O’Neill goes down in history as being the first time I have picked a winner for a horse race by looking at the race card.  Who knows why I picked it.  Maybe to be different from Chris who had advised November (the month of my birth and therefore the one I would have picked for no other reason).  Matt watched the last-minute changes of odds and joined me on Sahreej.  Bob (the bookie) took it well as he coughed up our winnings.  Time to hit the bar after I went to photograph Sahreej for posterity. We ventured to the parade ring before the 6.40 and watched these sensitive thoroughbreds walking round.  I wish I could say that it helped.  My plan to lump the pension on Tatting (a good old Black Country pastime) was thwarted by his non-runner status.  One of the others looked like it was dosed with valium so I picked Miniskirt for the simple reason that it looked a bit taller so I reasoned it might need fewer strides on the heavy going.  A scientific approach, and a losing one.  Matt went with the favourite, Firmament. Imagine our joy as Gold Prince took the W with all our bets nowhere.  Still in credit, just. The 7.10 needed very little thought.  For no other reason than having been to Italy this summer I stuck a fiver on Italian Beauty to win at 6/1.  Science hadn’t worked, so it was back to intuition for me.  Matt took Miss Inga Sock.  He took it well when Italian Beauty held off a challenge in the closing stages to win by a neck.  Bob (the bookie) also took it well.  Whatever happened now we were going home just a teensy bit wealthier. Better check on the big screen that it really did happen!  Italian Beauty at 5/1 for me! For the last, Matt went with the favourite Duffel after due consideration.  I went for Be Bold at 5/1 for no particular reason other than nominative determinism.  Tell you what, if I’d been wearing a hat I would have thrown it in the air as Be Bold won the race by a head in the last few strides.  We relieved Bob (the bookie) of more moolah and I pretended to know what I had been doing all along. This all means that I picked three winners out of six on my very first visit to the races.  Maybe there is something in beginner’s luck after all.  Would I go again?  Yes, but I would do some more research in advance so that there is more time for eating pies.  I have to say that the whole event felt very well-managed but as the pictures show I think the crowd numbers were disappointing for the organisers.  This was simply down to the weather.  For anyone interested in the details, the entry fee was £17 for the grandstand.  The rest of the cost will simply be down to how much you bet, lose and win.  The whole thing lasts about three-and-a-half hours.  Refreshments were of excellent range and quality and had typical "event" prices.  Facilities are superb, and there was post-racing entertainment with a live band in the Crafty Filly bar.  The races were class 3 to 5, which is the "lower leagues" in  these things but there were plenty of well-known trainers and jockeys on the card.  Standing at the rail, in practice you watch the race on the big screen and listen to the commentary before the moment that the field thunders by.  Alternatively you can head for the extra height of the stand for an overview of the finishing straight.  The racecard has gigabytes of information about the horses and their history for you to take into account before trying to outsmart the bookies.  History shows that the bookies usually win, and that my experience today is down to the natural variance of such things.  Either that or I am some sort of genius.  We will have to wait and see.
Course Pix
Racegoing must have been less interactive before the invention of Big Screens.
Horse Pix
Powderonthebonnet (with Jimmy Fortune) is about to lose me money on the 5.10 Kallisha (with George Baker) provides our first success of the evening Dane O'Neill dismounts, still unaware of the joy he has spread to the Yapps Sahreej, my first Winner Italian Beauty (9) on the way to victory!
What Next?
Watch @GrahamYapp on Twitter for details.  I have a long list of possible FA Cup ties for Saturday but a lot depends on how work goes this week.  Also, please keep an eye on therealfacup website for an FA Cup Preliminary Round Preview that I have sent to the editors!

Making Progress Down Football's Left Wing

Hopperational details
Date & Venue	Saturday 22 August 2015 at Broadhurst Park
Result	FC United of Manchester 3 Brackley Town 2
Competition	Conference North (Step 2)
Hopping	I am here at ground 576 to restore “The 160”, that is all of the current English grounds down to Step 2.  It actually comprises only 157 venues at the moment because of groundsharing arrangements for Gloucester City, Worcester City and Hayes & Yeading.  It’s a new stadium and plenty of hoppers will have it on this season’s hotlist.  Indeed, plenty have already been.
Pre-match preparation
FC United are looking for their first win at this level.  The club has risen pretty steadily up the pyramid since its formation, and this is their first full season at their own stadium.  Brackley Town are mid-table.
This match in one sentence
FC United showed resilience after going a goal down but also left themselves a nervy last few minutes on their way to a first step 2 victory.
So what? The not-won-yet burden is removed and Brackley stay in mid-table.
The drama unfolds
Despite an early departure from Hertfordshire, I only made it to the ground just in time for a quick batch of ground pix and a hasty pie and peas before kickoff.  Hello again, M6 northbound and your mysterious blockages.  This match will be well-covered elsewhere, so I will be brief.  I watched the first half from high-up in a corner of the end terrace housing the home fans.  Brackley Town’s 10th minute lead came rather against the run of play.  FC United failed to deal defensively with a ball down near the corner flag and the ball came back to Brackley full-back Stephan Morley in acres of space.  His cross was met firmly by the head of Steve Diggin who had lost his marker in a well-timed run to the near post.  0-1 after 10 mins The equaliser was created by another full-back, this time United’s Liam Brownhill.  He controlled the ball well on the flank and turned to create space for a left-footed cross which floated perfectly to give Matthew Wolfenden an unmissable close-range header.  1-1 after 14 mins It was Brownhill’s work again, this time with his right-foot, that led to a corner.  As the pressure built, Sam Madeley was in the right place to score and give United the lead which they held comfortably enough until the break.  2-1 after 26 mins and at half-time Madeley gives FCUM the lead and wheels away to celebrate ... I moved to the other end for the second half, and watched Brackley get back into the game.  More of their players were 6-foot plus and they started to use their physical advantages a bit more effectively.  Their substitute David Moyo looked a handful and cut inside to hit the woodwork after 57 minutes.  An equaliser looked on the cards, but somehow United weathered the storm and created a one-on-one chance for Tom Greaves.  He didn’t miss.  3-1 after 71 mins Cool finish from Greaves The tension eased and even the small core of Brackley fans seemed to accept the impending awayday defeat.  Then they received an unexpected gift in the form of a defensive lapse that let Moyo in to score with several nervy minutes still ahead.  3-2 after 81 mins It was indeed nervy.  Brackley had a set piece chance but the freekick went wide.  United’s clearances were hurried and they headed for the corner flag whenever they could.  However, the results pages will record that they hung on for a first Step 2 victory and another landmark.  Final Score 3-2 The thunderstorms that I encountered on the way back south gave me the worst driving conditions I have ever experienced.  They meant that I failed to get far enough down the M1 before the bollards meant that we queued for ages to get down to one lane.  Nine hours in total behind the wheel of the Yappmobile today.  It would be terrible to be a southerner and have to drive every week to watch football in Manchester.  Just saying.
Ground Pix
Match Pix
Something You Don’t Get in the Premier League
Goalkeeper Top Colour Stats
Green beats blue, but no clean sheets.  Full points table next time.
Soapbox Section
Their formation and progress has been well-documented elsewhere, and FC United look to be in a pretty healthy state with a very professional setup.  The stadium is still a work-in-progress but is already functioning perfectly well for this level.  They are an inspiration to other clubs who have sat contentedly in the lower leagues.  Altrincham are the nearest rivals in Step 1 and FC United have now caught up or overtaken the many established Step 2-4 clubs on the patch.  I think they are realistic enough not to expect annual promotions, but it is hard to imagine them getting relegated.  It is quite easy to imagine them as a sustainable League One outfit but then they would hit those barriers between sport and business that led to their formation in the first place.  Their average attendance will be around the 3000 mark, 2996 today.  At some point, just like it did for AFC Wimbledon, a competition will throw them up against Manchester United.  That will be interesting for the neutrals.  The only extra comment that I have about sustainability is that they have found a home closer to the Etihad than to Old Trafford, and yet in their terrace chants they have brought with them an anti-City sentiment.  Maybe this will in time put a limit on their fanbase, because people round here seem to be born blue or red.  Or maybe it will take twenty years for the club to have a core of supporters who are indifferent to the original Reds.  Mind you, the current FC United take the pitch looking just like my 1970s Manchester United Subbuteo team with simple and vibrant red shirts, white shorts and a green goalkeeper.  It is a great no-nonsense kit, and it sells well too.  Overall, I must say that it was a very positive matchday experience for this passing neutral.  It’s a left-leaning political place – see all the slogans on their flags and be prepared for pie queue conversations about which food companies pay tax in the UK – but I liked it and didn’t feel that I was gatecrashing someone else’s party.
What Next?
This visit leaves me with eleven Step 3 grounds to complete the next layer of English football, and I will be trying to get to all of them this season.  Most of them are in the Northern Premier, so plenty more time to come on the M6 for me then.  Work is about to take control of my life again as the new school term approaches, but watch @GrahamYapp on Twitter for details, and maybe become my latest 100th follower.  I have been hovering around the 1000 mark all summer.

Yapp's Ruff Guide to Barking

This beautifully and professional A4 size programme will mess up a lot of non-league filing systems!

Hopperational details
Date & Venue	Tuesday 18 August 2015 at Mayesbrook Park
Result	Barking 3 Felixstowe & Walton 1 (aet, 1-1 at 90min)
Competition	FA Cup Extra Preliminary Round
Hopping	Ground 575, and I am here because it is my nearest unvisited ground hosting an FA Cup replay.
Pre-match preparation
These two clubs are at Step 5.  Barking are in the Essex Senior League and Felixstowe & Walton are in the Eastern Counties Premier.  Saturday’s game was a 1-1 draw, with Barking having originally taken the lead.  I also did some skim-reading of a manual and will have a play around with some non-auto settings on the new(ish) camera!
This match in one sentence
A controversial 90th minute red card and goal did not in the end prove costly for Barking who coped well with having ten men in extra time.
So what?
A home tie with Haringey Borough awaits Barking in the next round.
The drama unfolds
The visitors had the better of the early exchanges without creating a gilt-edged chance.  Duane Wright came closest with two chances in quick succession.  Wale Odedoyun had been unluckily penalised for handball by a referee who gradually became the centre of attention as the evening went on.  The freekick eventually led to a scuffed shot and then there was a header just wide.  The sunset on the western horizon formed a great backdrop as Barking got back in the game and started to make better use of their size and pace up front.  Here is a scene-and-sun-setter clip with Barking in blue. Barking finished the first half on top except for one missed chance by Felixstowe’s Daniel Shy just before the whistle.  To be fair be probably expected an attacker in front of him to head the ball first.  0-0 at halftime I said a quick hello to @essexfootie filming in the stand and went to join a handful of F&W supporters behind the goal.  We saw Miles Powell shoot just over after Wright won a rare header to flick the ball on.  On the whole, however, the pace and power of Toby Adesina & Lindisipho Mtyanda looked more likely to score for Barking.  The opening goal was a straightforward header by Adesina from a right-wing corner.  1-0 after 66 mins It looked for a long time to be sufficient.  As the minutes ticked by, the referee showed a yellow card to Billy Rix for timewasting, and then bemused him by showing a red.  He correctly protested that he had not already been booked – the ref checked with his lino – oh, how we laughed.  Or not.  In stoppage time, however, the red card was produced again, also after checking with the assistant – a “straight” one for a lunging tackle by Mtyanda.  From the resulting freekick, the ball was cleared off the line but after pinging around a few times it was diverted into the roof of the net for the most dramatic of equalisers.  No idea of the scorer at the time of writing.  Extra time, then.  1-1 after 90 mins The visitors had the better of the next fifteen minutes.  Sub Armani Shaar shot over but there were no goals to report.  1-1 at half-time in extra time Barking keeper Jason Willis made a good double save to keep the scores level.  Felixstowe played a high defensive line to pin Barking back, but the ten men took the lead from a set piece.  Adesina lost his marker just long enough to plant this header past Danny Crump into the net.  If you saw my incorrect tweet at this point, many apologies.  Simple incompetence on my part.  2-1 after 117 mins Crump came up to join the attack for several corners as Felixstowe were forced forward but he was left in no-man’s land from a break and another Barking sub, Eden Nelson, scored an easy goal to win the tie.  Final score 3-1 This was a great game for the passing neutral.  Really the only thing F&W did wrong was not to have won the first game with home advantage. Commiserations to F&W.  As they say in the vernacular, "Go again!"
Ground Pix
Mayesbrook Park is a collection of huts and containers at the moment and will not win any beauty contests anytime soon.  However, we did have a very nice sunset…
Match Pix
Connor Field's (12) last-ditch header goes just wide ... Danny Crump (in yellow) is stranded upfield in Felixstowe's last attack
Something You Don’t Get in the Premier League
Goalkeeper Top Colour Stats
No clean sheets, but a win for GREY over YELLOW.  Full table to come at the end of the month.
What Next?
Watch @GrahamYapp on Twitter for details!  Next "priority" ground for me is FC United of Manchester to restore "Everything Down to Step 2" but prep for the new term is also needed so I am likely to be making last minute decisions, and maybe some random ones among them.